The Kelleher Rap

Lyrics: K. Ikin
Music: A. Routledge, D. Saunders
Recorded at St. Stephen's School, 1993
©1993-1997 K. Ikin, A. Routledge, D. Saunders

Born In England, in London to be exact
Now he lives in Glebe 'cos that's where it's at
Victor Kelleher
Born on 19th July '39
And he moved to Natal Uni '59
Victor Kelleher
South Africa's his pad in 1963
He hung out (in) Africa 'til 1973
I bet you're thinking right now "I wish he'd shut his trap"
Everybody join in, sing the Kelleher Rap

Victor Kelleher
Obsessed with the trends of the 90's age
Can't stand the bomb and the European way
Victor Kelleher
His favourite food: He's snackin' on chips
He models clay pots and he's joggin' to get fit
Victor Kelleher
All through his teens he never read a book
But his books are still good, why don't you take a look
I bet you're really glad my singing's out of key
Everybody join in, you'll sing the rap with me

Victor Kelleher
In '74 he began to write
When he was a kid he stayed up all night
Victor Kelleher
His parents were violent, they often had rows
But they were nice to him and they made him like now
Victor Kelleher
Up 'til now's written at least ten books
While his rough upbringing's made him nothing like a sook
I bet you're thinking right now "His dancing's pretty bad"
Everybody join in, sing the Kelleher rap!

I wrote this for a school project where the task was to give a short talk on an author. I had selected Victor Kelleher, a well known Australian writer. I wanted to do something different for my talk, and remembering how easy it had been to write my first two songs, the next logical step was to write a rap for the assignment.

The original performance incorporated a video clip of myself trying to dance (recorded using a friend's video camera), a cheap tape deck and no-name brand cassette with music taped from a program on my Commodore 64 computer (I think it was called Dual Cassette 2 by Ash & Dave Software). The thing I remember most though is everyone's complete lack of enthusiasm - I tried to involve people by making them chant "Victor Kelleher, Victor Kelleher!", but it didn't work. Instead, to fill in the gaps I watched myself on the video clip and remarked "I never knew my dancing was so bad..."

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